“The children didn’t ask for this divorce” shared the premier plasterer who scheduled his day around meeting the children at their buses after school, doing homework with them at their Mother’s home, until she returned from her corporate job.
A CFO of his company delivered the two children to school and picked them up five days a week. They did homework at the children’s private school, after school, had snacks, and were delivered to Mom’s house on the alternate weeks when they didn’t live at his home.
One Mom left her home three nights a week, to attend classes, or visit with friends, while the children’s Dad came to her home, gave the children dinner and baths, and read them stories. The children spent Saturdays initially with Dad, and Sundays with their Mother.
Another family had Friday evenings, including dinner, stories, and tuck-ins every week.
Many parents are deeply frightened that divorcing and restructuring their families means there will be many days between those during which they will see their children. It doesn’t have to be that way. Parents can design creative schedules, especially initially, so that they and their children have almost daily contact with one another. They are used to daily access, except when a parent travels, and many parents want to keep it that way.
Couples coming to The Negotiation Collaborative, Janet Miller Wiseman Mediation and Counseling Services receive the benefit of continuously brainstorming creative options for living arrangements schedules until they reach one that is flexible over time, and comfortable for parents and children, alike.
Where there is a will to frequent access between children and parents, there is a way!
Janet Miller Wiseman, LICSW, Certified Divorce and Family Mediator, The Negotiation Collaborative, Janet Miller Wiseman, Mediation and Counseling Services